Happy Holidays! Though sometimes it feels a bit more like Happy Holidays? The two themes that keep coming up for me in big and small waves are grief and gratitude.
We are grieving the big things- time lost with family and memories we aren’t able to create together this year. But also the little things- the holiday traditions like tree lighting ceremonies, visits to Santa, Hanukkah or cookie decorating parties. Maybe you are like me and your kids are grieving these things too, or maybe your children were finally old enough to enjoy some of these traditions, and you’re grieving that loss for your family this year.
Many of you have heard me quote before one of my all time favorite authors, researchers, and speakers Brene Brown in saying that gratitude is the antidote to anxiety. This year, I’m wondering if it is also the antidote to this sense of loss we feel. I am trying to focus on and be grateful for the traditions that remain unchanged- playing dreidel, lighting the menorah, decorating holiday cookies and gingerbread houses and Christmas music dance parties!
I'm also remembering that in all of this, there might just be some silver linings. Many families have shared with me that this will be their first time not traveling for the holidays. And while again there is some grief, they are really looking forward to not having to spend lots of time in planes and cars, navigating time with extended family and friends, packing and unpacking and moving kids around and around. Though it may be different, there may be something quite fun about one of those cozy quiet Christmases or holiday seasons this year. I’m trying to let the waves of grief come, give them a place and a time, but also trying to remember what I’m grateful for this year, including life itself, and this helps me from being swallowed up by these waves.
Some other things that we're looking forward to- our family spent some time creating a list of local places, hikes, and things we’d like to do together both indoors and outdoors over break. I also spent some time creating a little “me zone” in my house with a pedicure station, a journal and a couple of books I hope to read over the holidays. I’m hoping that this will inspire me to carve out a little time for myself during this busy season.
May you find peace, rest and surprising amounts of joy this holiday season,
Rebecca