Day 60: Increasing Your Frustration Tolerance, Triggers, Freshen up Your Play Dough, City Scavenger Hunt

SELF-LOVE: 

What do you do when you're triggered by your child? For me, something that really helps is just to say out loud: "I am feeling really frustrated (angry, disappointed, etc.) right now." It helps me to just bring consciousnesses to this feeling, tap into my prefrontal cortex, and keep me from going down the yelling, blaming or punishing route. It is surprisingly simple and effective. I also make a mental note to work in some more connection time with the child who has just triggered me...more on that tomorrow!

PARENTING TIP:

Increasing frustration tolerance. Yesterday I mentioned we had gone through old videos for Maggie's 8th birthday.  This one came up and it really struck me because my daughter, at 8, has some serious grit, determination, and independence about her. Watching this video made me really want to thank my partner for his part in developing this!    Here she is supported and encouraged, but dad resists the urge to just jump in and do it for her. It is harder in practice than it is in theory, because it always seems easier to do it for them or at least show them what to do.  However, as Justin so perfectly illustrates, most of the time, all the child needs is someone to reflect back their experience for them, and sure enough they can figure it out on their own. 

Video is here.

INDOOR ACTIVITY: 

If you made play dough in the beginning of the Quarantine, it might be about time for a new batch! Here's my mom's recipe circa 1980-still the best one out there!

1/2 c Salt, 1 C flour, 2 TLB cream of tartar, 1 Tlb oil 1 C water.  A few drops of food coloring.  Mix all in a medium saucepan over low heat. As the play dough begins to form a ball, turn off heat and knead on a floured surface. Once it has cooled down, be sure to give your child some warm play-dough to knead. Try adding essential oils or glitter for an added sensory experience!

OUTDOOR ACTIVITY: 

City Scavenger Hunt: Create a list with check-marks (don't let the perfect get in the way of the good) using the following ideas. Something blue, something shiny, something round, something loud, a flower, a bird, a bug, a dog, a church, a school. Have fun!

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